I am so hungover…. who said cocktails were a good idea, they were right but not the amount I drank…? Anyway
I am not ok; we will start there. This is not a mass explanation of my past of why I am not ok it is a way of trying to show people how to approach and act toward a person going through a difficult time.
Firstly, do not try to understand it, you do not need to try and turn yourself into a therapist that will have all the answers because you will not. When someone is most likely struggling to understand why they feel the way they do, the last thing they need is someone else trying to psychoanalyse them. Be a friend and listen to someone, offer constructive advice and ask how you can help them if that’s what you want to do, do not play genius and tell them how they’re feeling and what they have to do to fix it.
Secondly do not try to determine how they feel. Don’t assume someone’s better now because they’ve gone out to a restaurant or to see a friend, it probably took them a lot of strength to get out their front door and the people they’re seeing are the ones they are most comfortable with that they know will offer them a safe environment, if that’s not you then accept that, nobody owes you an explanation when it comes to their struggles.
I am writing about myself…. Could you tell….
I’ve done some shitty things in my time but I’ve also been through some awful things that I’m still coming to terms with and probably still will be years down the line, that is not an excuse because I don’t want to make excuses but I also don’t want to give the world an explanation, sometimes things just need to be accepted and walked away from.
In short simple words, you do not get to determine how someone else feels, you do not get to decide if someone is ok.