The F Word

Fat….This topic has honestly only become important to me personally within the last year.

So I’ll start by being blunt and honest I was one of those people that shames others for their weight, never to their face because I was just being a sly bully really ( I was a bit of a c*nt once upon a time).

So my experience over the last year of “fat”… as we all know I’ve been going through it a bit mentally and one of my coping mechanisms is that I eat and when I say I eat I mean I EAT, not balanced not healthy its usually something high in salt or sugar or both. I have fluctuated massively with regards to my weight over the last year and the only time it’s celebrated is if I lose weight and that sucks, because last time I lost weight I lost about a stone in 2 weeks and that wasn’t through trying that’s because I was going through a bit of a f*cked up time and I stopped eating.

I have now put about ¾ of the weight I lost back on and if I’m honest I’m happy about it, I like being curvy I like how I look even if that is full of cellulite and a few rolls. The only bit about my weight that bothers me is what other people think and that’s not fair.

I have had it pointed out to me a lot over the years by the adult figures in my life if I’ve put on weight and it does take it’s toll, I’d wear baggy clothes just to hide the fact I’d put on some weight, also I bloat, I bloat to the point I look like I’ve swallowed a beach ball so keeping track of my weight and how clothes (jeans I hate jeans) fit is just a no.

In no way am I promoting an unhealthy lifestyle here we should all look after ourselves, I’m fortunate that I have someone very special in my life that consistently encourages me to eat better, I may pout about it sometimes but it’s helping me so the pout doesn’t last very long.

No one should not want to wear a certain outfit or go out because they face being shouted and judged due to their size for example I don’t remember the last time I went out in shorts or a skirt and I get so nervous wearing a dress. The only thing that should impact your weight should be your health and your happiness, not what other people say. This applies to all weights and all genders, guys you don’t need to be muscly to be manly and girls you don’t need to be shaped like the number 8 to be feminine. Be any size and shape as long as it makes you happy and comfortable in your own skin, screw everyone else’s opinions.

And to my favourite girls that face this shit way more than I do, you’re gorgeous and you don’t need to be anything other than what you want to be!

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